Some Gambling Jokes

Here are some the best online casino/gambling jokes to ease your gambling boredom.

Real Age

A woman was in a casino for the first time. The spinning ball of the roulette wheel has always captured her attention. She settles to play at the roulette table and she says, “I have no idea what number to play.”

A young, good-looking man close to her advises she play her age. Smiling at the man, she puts her money on number 29. The wheel is spun, and 36 comes up. The from the woman’s face fade away and she faints.

Sincerity

Question: What is the difference when praying in church and when praying in the casino?

Answer: When praying in the casino you really mean it!

The Shy Boy

Little Tommy was a shy boy, specially in school. He never answered any questions but his homework was always quite excellent. If any one said anything to him he would simply no d, or shake his head. The staff thought of something to help him get rid of his shyness and give him confidence. “Tommy,” said his teacher. “I’ve just bet Miss Smith $5 I can get you to say three words. You can have half.” Tommy looked at her slyly and said, “You lose.”

Bright Dog

Two dog owners were boasting about the intelligence of their pets. “The most brilliant dog I ever had,” said one, “was a Great Dane that could play cards. He was a genius at poker, but I had him put to sleep.” “You had him put to sleep, a bright dog like that? A dog like that would be worth a million dollars.” “Had to,” he replied, “Caught him using marked cards!”

Ours Is Prettier

A husband and wife were having dinner at a very fine restaurant when this absolutely beautiful young woman comes over to their table, gives the husband a big kiss, tells him she’ll see him later, and walks away.

His wife was shock, glares at him and says, “Who was that?”

The Husband replies calmly”Oh, that was my mistress.”

The wife gets mad and says, “That’s it; I want a divorce.”

“I understand,” replies her husband, “But, remember, if you get a divorce, there will be no more shopping trips to Paris, no wintering in the Caribbean, no Infinity or Lexus in the garage, and no more Country Club, but the decision is yours.”

Just then the wife notices a mutual friend entering the restaurant with a gorgeous woman. “Who’s that woman with Jim? ” she asks.

“That’s his mistress,” replies her husband.

“Ours is much more prettier,” says the wife

Popular Online Casino Games

Here are some of the popular games that are often played in the Casinos and are very popular among the players. All of them are played extensively both online and in old fashioned casinos The games listed here are classified according to the popularity they have among the players all over the world.

The First Favorite Online Casino Game Starting with Blackjack, this card games is the most popular card game among the users all over the world. The target of the game is to make a hand that is worth 21 point. The game is played between a dealer of the casino and the players. If the player makes 21 points they win the wager. But another thing that needs to be taken care of is that if your hand exceeds 21 then you will end losing. The Face cards like Jack, Queens and Kings will be counted as 10 and the numbered cards have the value as their face value. The ace can have the value depending on the hand. It varies from 1 to 11.

The Second Favorite Online Casino Games Poker is another game that has gained popularity in recent times. For a person to be able to play poker they must be able to understand all the rules that come with it. The values of the cards are as follows. The highest numbered card is the Ace and then the rest are in the descending order of King, Queen and Jack and so on up till the numbered card 2. Unlike Blackjack the value of all the cards are same here. There are many variations of Poker and all of them are widely played all over the world.

The Third Favorite Online Casino Games This is one game that is purely based on luck. It is one of the popular games that are available in the casinos. Slots are very popular among the users because you don’t need to apply your brains to win it. You just have to put in some initial money to activate the machine and there are three rolls with images that start rolling. If there is same image on all the three rolls then you win the jackpot. And there is no need to worry if you are not able to decipher the machine. All you have to do is put a coin in the machine. If it lights up then you win. If it doesn’t then you can try again.

The Fourth Favorite Online Casino Games Roulette is a very lively game that can be enjoyed by many people at a single time. The game consists of a wheel which is rolled and it consists of 37 to 38 sections. A ball is placed on the wheel and then it randomly settles on one of the sections which then become the wining number. The person who selects that number winds that round.

Playing Poker Online Indonesia

To play on online gambling betting, it is necessary to make sure there is a player. If there is no site in the online gambling gambling game, it will not be able to enjoy the joy of playing soccer online gambling. The pokernet88 is a tool for players to carry out online soccer betting. Agents will also connect plaayers to online soccer bookies. For this reason, the selection of a trusted agent needs to be done so that the betting process is safe, comfortable and there are no obstacles. For how to choose a trusted soccer gambling agent in Indonesia, it is easy to bother. Today there are many scams that use the name of an online soccer gambling agent. To want to know how to choose an online soccer gambling agent in Indonesia, see the following review.

For the first and key method, the most important thing is to know the agent that is followed, has a 24-hour non-stop service system. This 24-hour non-stop service helps players in any case related to online soccer betting. When a player experiences a problem or disorder, it is confused at that time and the agent is needed in it. If the agent has a 24-hour non-stop service, the player can directly contact the agent. A trusted soccer gambling agent in Indonesia is sure to have these services. A trusted agent must provide a 24-hour non-stop betting withdrawal service system. The agent will contact the player either by telephone or e-mail or other liaison media. If the agent does not provide the above, it is appropriate to suspect that the is a fraud.

For how to choose a trusted soccer gambling in Indonesia, then trust is to see the number of players who carry out bets inside the situs . If there are many players in the soccer gambling game, then the best service system can be ascertained so as to make the players feel at home and comfortable in online gambling ball games. The more number of players available, the better the agent will be. For how to choose the next one is to know whether the website is blacklisted or not. To find out it can be directly on the google search engine. Browse to the roots so that later you will get a trusted and best poker.

For the next way to choose a trusted Poker Online gambling site in Indonesia, it is trusted to have a lot of friends at least one who has the same hobby, namely online gambling betting. If you already have the same friends in one hobby, then you can ask for the best advice which agent can be trusted and be used as a place to carry out online gambling betting. Friends or relationships in this case are very useful for choosing and sorting trusted agents rather than looking for oneself who do not necessarily get webs that are far more accurate. For the next way of selecting is to select an bandar that has testonomy on the site where the testonomy has a positive value in online gambling betting. To ensure the testonomy is correct, it is necessary to contact the party in the testonomy to ask about the agent being followed. If later there are many positive values from the answers given, it is certain that the website can be trusted. Those are some of the right and accurate ways to choose the best and most trusted online gambling situs in Indonesia. Hopefully this brief review will be useful and useful information.

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